With Allah

Relationship with Allah (العلاقة مع الله)

REPENTANCE (التوبة)

Repentance means going back to Allah ﷻ. It is a feeling and an action. After committing a certain sin, then you get a feeling of sorrow and being sorry for having done that sin and you want to go back to Allah ﷻ to ask Him for forgiveness. Repentance is obligatory for all humans. Human, in general, after committing a sin, needs to repent because you need a road to go back. Allah ﷻ is telling all the people to repent so that they will be successful. He also said that Allah ﷻ loves those who repent and those who are purify themselves. The knowledge that you know the result of your sin is what leads you to repentance. You have to be fast in your repentance. As soon as you got the knowledge and understanding that you have done something wrong, you have to repent immediately. Do not leave it for a long time because you do not know what will happen. For other people, they leave it until the moment of death. Allah ﷻ said that waiting until the last moment of your life and you repent, that is not right. One should repent immediately. In teaching the new Muslim, emphasize the importance of repentance. Repentance is the main door in going back to Allah ﷻ, either she committed a sin by ignorance or by knowing it but she committed the sin anyway. She needs to know that there is a way back to Him. Some people say there is no forgiveness but Allah Almighty is saying otherwise. He is The One who forgives and The One who accepts repentance.

There are 4 categories that make a person commit a sin: All these feelings trigger you to commit a sin.

  1. Feeling like big (arrogance…)
  2. Feeling like a devil (envy, jealousy, cheating…)
  3. Feeling like an animal (sexual desire, gluttony, usury…)
  4. Feeling like wild (anger, attacking people…)

There are 6 reasons that make a small sin into a big sin. Minor sins can easily lead someone to commit a major sin, and repeatedly committing a minor sin will change its status to that of a major sin.

  1. Insistence on the sin. You do the sin regularly. Habitual sinning causes a Muslim to lose faith and disregard the commandments of Allah. “Nay, their hearts have been sealed by the sins they have accumulated.” [Al-Mutaffifin: 14]
  2. Thinking that the sin is so small. You cannot say it is just a minor issue, there is no harm done. Remember Allah at all times as this helps refrain from sins of the tongue, heart, mind and hands. The Muslim should not look at how small or great the sin is, rather he should look at the greatness and might of the One Whom he is disobeying. Minor sins are not, however, to be taken lightly, as disobeying Allah is always a serious matter. Allah says: “You counted it a little thing, while with Allah it was very great.” [An-Nur 24:15]
  3. Feeling happy on doing it. You brag about doing that sin.
  4. Taking it easy that Allah ﷻ has covered your sins. You cannot say that because no one knows about your sin so you continue doing it.
  5. When you do the sin in public without any fear.
  6. If you are a person of knowledge (scholar, preacher, teacher…) that people look up to you guidance.

People in their repentance are divided into 4 levels:

  1. Nafs Al-Mutma’innah: a person who commits a sin and feels sorry for it and goes back to Allah ﷻ and repent and never come back to it (the sin). This is At-Tawbah An-Nasuhah.  They are the strongest. They live the rest of their lives trying to erase that sin. If you have committed one sin and repented, that sin is the reason for you not to commit a any other sin again.
  2. Nafs Al-Lawwamah: a person who does not do the major sins but she gets tested over and over again by small sins. Trials come in her life on all sides, and every time she commits a sin, she feels bad and keeps blaming herself why she did that. And that keeps her in a state of repentance all the time. 
  3. Nafs Al-Ammarah Bis Su: a person who commits a sin and she keeps doing it. Every time she stops, her desire overtakes her. She commits a sin out of her weakness. She delays her repentance because she is not capable of stopping the act.
  4. A person who commits a sin and keeps doing it but she does not repent from it.

3 things that you have to do after committing a sin: Allah will forgive your sins when you do 1 or 2 of the following or you do 3 altogether, to clean your sins and to ask for forgiveness.

  1. By doing acts of worship: Salah, Sawm, Zakat, Sadaqah…
  2. By heart: feeling the guilt and sorrow and hoping that Allah ﷻ will forgive you for that sin.
  3. By acknowledging that you have sinned and repenting by your tongue

The treatments for not insisting on committing the sin. 

  1. By reminding her verses and Ahadith about the rulings for Halal and Haram and its punishments
  2. By telling her about the stories of the prophets and righteous people might wake up her heart and make her stop committing a sin
  3. By telling her that the punishment could be faster, and it could be in this life now and not in the hereafter

PATIENCE (الصبر)

There is another kind of patience, the patience of obedience. You need to emphasize to the new Muslim about obedience because this is the hardest for her. Keeping up with her prayers 5 times a day, fasting the whole month of Ramadan, following the Islamic dress code… these are not easy on her. First of all, it is a matter of habit, a matter of practice and timing… all of these come her way. You need to connect to her that love of obedience (to Allah ﷻ) so it will be easy for her and she will get used to it. Some sisters are having problems in practicing their Islam. It is really hard for them to cope up. Some sisters are working in the house and they will tell you: “I work the whole day without break; I forgot; I don’t know…” Maybe they are not even receiving help in developing their Islam. They are all alone by themselves.

Encourage her to love doing worship and remind her of the reward she is getting from doing it. Allah ﷻ gives the credit for everything; nothing of your good deeds will go to waste as long as your intention for doing it is solely for the sake of Allah. Make her love doing acts of worship to let her collect more reward.  How would she know how? By teaching her those acts of worship.

Do you think Yusuf did not have any desire for that woman? If he did not have any desire, rejecting her would not be hard. Is his credit for rejecting the woman the same as when he did not have the desire? He knows what he likes and wanting it. He is a man and he had the desire but what stopped him not having that desire is his belief that he was stopping that for the sake of Allah ﷻ. Strong faith comes and save you at the moment of desire and weak moment that we all go through it. Let us be honest, do not lie and say that you do not beat your child; do not lie and say that you do not look at a man and imagine things. We are humans. When do you need the support? You will turn and say: “I seek refuge in Allah from the cursed Satan.” We need to have that love for Allah ﷻ, without that love without that relation, you would not do anything to avoid the Haram.