By: Maryam Amir
Virgin Mary عليها السَّلام miraculously bore Christ ﷺ, one of the most incredible men to walk the planet, but she was never married.
Aishah رضي الله عنها had an incredible marriage, but she was never a mother. She was also a widow.
Asiyah عليها السَّلام was an adoptive mother to Mosesﷺ, but was married to a tyrannical husband.
The blessed Prophetic father ﷺ of Hajar’s رضي الله عنها son Ismail ﷺ was alive but physically separated from them and so she essentially raised her son as a single mother.
Eve عليها السلام had one child who was committed to morality, and she another who must have torn her heart out when he murdered his own brother.
Zaynab bint Jahsh رضي الله عنها was divorced, but then remarried the best man on earth ﷺ.
Fatimah رضي الله عنها was repeatedly described as the most devoted daughter in addition to her roles as wife and mother.
Khadijah رضي الله عنها had the most amazing husband ﷺ with the most amazing children and the most compassionate, passionate marriage.
The Queen of Sheba عليها السَّلام is described in the Qur’an in connection with her position, but not explicitly in connection to marriage or motherhood.
God gave us examples in history of some of the most spiritually elevated women in different types of single/married or motherhood/less situations.
It is unjust for our community to portray a woman’s piety being connected solely to her marriage or motherhood status when even some of the most important figures of our history did not fulfill some of our community’s contemporary expectations. Yes, marriage and motherhood are so important. But not every woman will experience them, nor find happiness in them. That is not commentary on her worth or the level of her connection to Allah.
Sisters: God knows your life circumstances, even when everyone looking in from the outside have no idea of your pain, of your frustration or your confusion or your burning Dua. And I know many of you deal with pressure constantly. But instead of feeling crippled when you’re overwhelmed, focus on these women. God gave us their myriad of examples for a reason. Let’s draw our strength from them and renew our commitment to Him and to working for His sake regardless of our status.